The least they could do is carve it into a bear 🐻

On always doing the most and how I'm trying to reform this habit

There is a house that we drive by quite frequently with a large tree stump in the front yard. And really, it isn’t a stump as much as it is a full tree trunk. On one such pass-by, I said absently to Tyler, “The least they could do is carve it into a bear, you know?”

According to Tyler, this remains one of the most amusing things I have ever said to him. As if it is easy to carve a full tree trunk into the shape of a bear in the name of aesthetics. In my defense, we often pass another tree carved into a lion (pictured below), so trees carved into animals are perhaps more top of mind for me than your average bear.

Tree trunk at a local shop carved into a lion. The least they could do.

Although my comment was clearly in jest (it was! I promise!), there is a tinge of truth around the edges: I am often doing the absolute most. I am figuratively carving tree trunks into bears when really, I could just leave it as is. Plant some flowers around it, perhaps adorn it with twinkle lights during the holidays, and call it good enough. There are only so many hours in a day, so many days in a year. Do I really want to spend them all carving?

Sometimes yes, I really do. Often, we’ll get the kids down, and I’ll stay up until midnight taking care of various chores (laundry, packing lunches, tidying the house), taking care of us (making a nice dinner for Tyler and I a couple times a week), working on passion projects (this Substack, a summer class I’m taking through Harvard in my discipline). I know I will be tired the next day, but doing the most is often worth it: a clean house, laundry piles at a respectable level, not a frozen pizza for dinner, time with my husband, and exercising my creative brain. All wins in my book.

Vintage bear print and stuffed animal from L’s room. You know, for the bear theme of this post.

Until, of course, I need a break. And it can be hard for me to fully register that I need to slow down when carving the tree into a bear is my normal, when I don’t usually mind being tired because I am also fulfilled.

I’m working on shifting into some kind of balance between doing it all and knowing when to climb into bed early and call it a night.¹ This is hard to do, because as a mom of very small children, time is my most precious commodity, and I want to spend it in meaningful, productive ways. I need to acknowledge, however, that rest is equally meaningful and productive.

I’m not here to offer some big reveal, hack, or trick. I’m just a person, keeping my promise to myself to write weekly, on the internet, documenting this season of my life. These are the years, right? I’m living through the time I’ll look back on with nostalgia.

Even so, it’s okay to take a nap. Binge a show. Leave a laundry pile.

She said to herself, as she finished her weekly post around 11:00 pm on the day it needed to be published.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow I’ll call it early, okay? 🐻🌳

1. Early is about 10:00 pm for me. 🦉 I am who I am!